Been so busy lasy couple of days, just rewired home & office to accommodate my daughter’s computer in her room, and soon I will have to snow blow the drifts that formed from the couple of inches of snow we for later today.
peacevine is off to po-town — saw her off earlier today, after having stayed over the last couple of days. The overall coolness density of the Buffalo area therefore has suddenly dropped. She got to meet (and be met by) my wife, daughter, and my brother Jeff. They all concur. She belongs in the family. Just getting to know her so well (in such a short time nonetheless) I feel has somehow changed my life, and in no subtle way. I realized many things, and many more are surfacing to my consious mind even as I write this. The world of faraway lands seems more real to me. A new sense of other has developed, as I have met so few people who have really touched me for some time. I found an excuse to see myself from the outside again and … reflect. ( Yes, I am a little bit of a “dork” I suppose.) I realized that there are people out there who really want to hear about some of the topics I subject my friends and family to repeatedly. Strangely, we embrace on the doorway of the traincar, and she says “Have a good life” as if I will never see her again. I suppose I must admit that is possible, and it made me a little sad to concede this, even though I have some confidence I’ll keep in touch with her … that she’ll respond to this journal entry in a few days.
I will look forward to any excuse to meet up with her again, here or somewhere in the world — she wants us to visit her at Vassar, and I sincerely wish I could lead two lives — one where I could keep the fort and work the homestead, and another where Merry and I could travel as we please and visit all those people who mean something to us without disrupting the cosmic fabric of our lives. But the river stops for no one.
Jes, if you’re reading this, remember how you feel around other people you admire sometimes, like they are in another class? Well I feel you are amazingly cool (and the people I know who met you agree), almost in an “I’m not worthy” sort of way. But moreso, I feel I got to know you as a real person on many levels and made some indescribable connection. I hope you felt a growing soulful kinship, too.
On another topic (sort of), I got the courage to climb to thee top of a sixty-some foot ladder in the barn the other day. I overcame my fear, took a (quick) look around from above, and my arms felt cramps by the time I climbed down! That and unbaling hay, mucking stalls, etc. was a bit much for someone who doesn’t do it all the time. I did get to play with working on the New Holland tractor with Stew, namely putting on the weights so we could unlad a pallet of dirt. Brought huge amounts of vegetables home, as usual.
Anyway, I’m heading back upstairs to try and get Chrissie’s computer to talk with the network and share the Internet connection.