I’ve been edgy lately, worried about my daughter’s mom’s. She’s not speaking to me, which is okay (except for the whole parental responsibility thing), and for the supposed reason she fears I am trying to find things to get her in trouble (major irony from my view).
But she’s looking for excuses to be mad at me now. Fortunately, my daughter speaks up for me when a message is to be passed to me (inappropriately) like stop honking in the middle of the day because it wakes up the baby. But I’m (once again) afraid to call my own daughter, now because it will be “my fault” if the baby wakes up.
It’s like a replay of the countless times Chrissie was used as the excuse to make me a bad guy (like the “for the children” crap politicians use when they want to push something through), or taking things out on Christina that wouldn’t have happened if I dod or didn’t do such-and-such — the pattern fits, and it scares me. I shouldn’t care about such nonsense, but Chrissie has to deal with it. I still say as a parent to do that is just plain sick, but I don’t even want to think about it enough to go into detail. It’s in the past … in the past … in the past.
Or so I hope.
If I have to put my foot down (like I’ve avoided for so many years now), I’ll be made out the bad guy for “getting mommy in trouble again” or again, it will be twisted into some crime against my daughter by trying to defend her. But I swear to God, if such an oath is not a sin, I will not stand for it.